As I've mentioned in pretty concise detail, I've moved back home. Half to take care of my father and half because I'm poor and have no other viable way to live, save couch hopping. It's been a few weeks since my last entry which was pretty much on the day I've moved in. It's been good to take refuge again. The failure and depression I battled at the apartment really took it's toll on me both physically and emotionally.
While there have been a number of events that could be considered noteworthy in the time between now and my last entry, I want to talk about a specific incident that just happened and struck me as odd, or perhaps poetic?
I'd been working on Son of Sam all day. I was tired and sore from my helping an old pal of mine move apartments. A third floor apartment's worth of junk and furniture to his sister's fourth floor. I worked feverishly because I was back on my ADD medication and finished a whole page in a day. By six o' clock my lungs felt like they were on fire and I had the makings of a monster headache brewing, so I invited Jackie out to eat. It was enjoyable, we ate at a McMinnamin's that we'd never been to. It had tall pine trees in the back, and I insisted we take a seat there so I could enjoy my cigarettes. In between Team Fortress 2, Buffy's humorously archaic depictions of technology, we talked of getting older. How time passes faster and how I wish I could go back to the place in time where I could spend half a day staring at my grandma's quilted blankets alone in my room.
Our meal concluded and I drove home, sufficiently smoked up.
When I arrived home it was still quite late and the house was quiet. Most nights everyone follows my dad to bed around 9 and it was just after ten. Feeling a bit dehydrated I went to the kitchen to get something to drink. While filling my cup I kept hearing a noise outside, I flipped the light on a peaked out. MY dad had left the water on and the hose was drowning the lawn. I was about to go out and turn it off but I didn't want to get my socks all muddy, so I looked around for something to slip into only to find a pair of my dad's grey converse. I quickly put my feet in and noticed the dramatic size difference. That's when I caught the surreal feeling of it all and I just paused. I looked up at myself in the reflection on the sliding glass door. I looked ridiculous in them and I could feel the indents worn into the insoles, hills and valleys to my feet.
Still feeling a bit odd and smiling I tromped outside and turned off the water.
Sometimes I feel old but perhaps I have more time than I realize.
